Game of Thrones Review “The Lion and the Rose” S4E2

The Lion and the Rose
SPOILER ALERT! Warning, this recap has major spoilers to “The Lion and the Rose,” if you haven’t watched the episode yet, please go to HBO GO immediately!

HBO GO shut down because of traffic last week, (this is after fixing the glitch that caused the True Detective season finale crash) 6.6 million viewers watched “Two Swords”, the season premier, and our favorite gamers got the cover of Vanity Fair magazine. Game of Thrones is making its argument for best television series of all time, or at least the bloodiest. According to Vanity Fair, (Yes, I read VF) the show has been illegally downloaded more than any other in history. Not only that, but President Barack Obama gets early screenings in the White House, not a bad perk for Commander-in-chief.

I’d like to start by saying that rarely does a T.V. series cause its watchers to be so impassioned. Just last week I had a Facebook war with fellow Hush writer, Jené Conrad about whether or not Khaleesi is a name or title for Daenerys Targaryen.

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Hurrah! George R.R. Martin actually wrote the script for this week’s episode. We open with a hunt. A young woman is being chased through the woods by Theon Greyjoy’s captor, Ramsay Snow, a female archer, Greyjoy, and a pack of wild dogs. Greyjoy, now called Reek by Ramsay, watches as Ramsay sadistically let’s the dogs tear her apart.

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We immediately cut to another phallic reference following that scene with Tyrion and Jamie eating a meal. This is an on going theme since Ramsay removed Theon’s…manhood.

Tyrion seeks to strengthen his bond with his brother by offering his bodyguard Bronn, to train him to use a sword with one hand. The scene made me laugh as I thought to myself of the classic, Princess Bride moment, “I am not left-handed!”

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Ramsay Snow, returns home. He greets his father, but the welcome is not friendly. It’s important to note that Ramsay is also a bastard. Ramsay’s father, Lord Roose Bolton seems domineering and cold. But they bask in their victories. Theon Greyjoy is presented as a trophy. Bolton is disappointed that Theon has been broken. But Ramsay earns his father’s graces by revealing that Bran and Rickon Stark are still alive. Theon admits that he did not murder the Stark boys and they are now part of the game. They quickly devise a plan and Jon Snow will soon be paid a visit by Locke, the guy who chopped off Jamie’s hand.

Tyrion has been warned by Lord Varys about his former lover, Shae being outed. Tywin Lannister promised to murder the next whore found with his son. Tyrion must now protect her.

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He confronts her, breaks her heart, for her own good, and demands that she leave. He arranged passage for her on a boat, she had no choice but to take his offer.

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We cut to Joffrey and Margaery’s pre-wedding ceremony. The book of The Four Kings is presented to Joffery as a gift from Tyrion. Joffery seems to have reconciled as he gives thanks to Tyrion. He then, in a spoiled fit, destroys the book Tyrion offered with a newly acquired Valyrian blade. He celebrates by antagonizing Sansa while gloating over the death of Ned Stark.

Stannis Baratheon is still sacrificing souls to strengthen his power. What a weirdo. Let’s hope Davis Seaworth gets out of there soon. He is still the only voice of reason in that cult of crazies.

Bran has been hunting as a Dire Wolf. His abilities to live as animals in the Westeros are growing stronger. He and his band are still traveling beyond the wall. He is having difficultly staying in human form. Hodor places him by a Heart Tree, these Weirwood trees with carved faces are found in the Godswood. Bran sees his father and the three eyed crow, and a dragon over King’s Landing. A voice commands him to go north.

Wedding of Joffery and Margaery Tyrell was magnificent. It was truly a wedding of royalty. Tyrion leaned into his wife Sansa and muttered, “Better her than you.” Preach!

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The celebration was grand and colorful. We have rarely seen King’s Landing that plush. In a tender moment, Margaery’s grandmother, Olenna Tyrell offers her condolences to Sansa by saying, “As if men need more reasons to fear marriage.” In reference to The Red Wedding. Jamie and Loras Tyrell get into a pissing match over Cersei. Jamie’s jealously is rampant. Loras is engaged to marry Cersei by order of Tywin. Immediately Cersei confronts Lady Brienne and the proud warrior woman inadvertently declares her love for Jamie. In a fit of anger, Cersei commands that the leftover food from the celebration go to the dogs of King’s Landing rather than the poor as the new Queen Margaery had declared.

Lord Oberyn finds the Lannisters in the middle of the celebration and intentionally insults Cersei and Tywin. He also subtly makes a threat on Cersei’s daughter, Myrcella. This revenge plot will be one to follow!

The party continues. The War of the five kings plays out in grand theatrical manner with fools in costume. Sansa watches in quite contemplation as everyone is disgusted except for Joffrey.

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Fools Rush In

He is cruel and pompous. Drunk on power Joffrey pours wine on Tyrion’s head, he continues to torment his uncle until the entire wedding party is uncomfortable. Joffrey drops his gauntlet and Sansa and Tyrion share a moment as she retrieves it for him.
Joffrey orders Tyrion to kneel. Tyrion refuses. The tension is high and is broken only when the pigeon pie is brought out. As Joffrey sips from his goblet. He begins to choke. It becomes clear that he has been poisoned! It’s about fucking time! In a glorious performance his face turns pale, then blue and purple. He points towards Tyrion with his final act as king and dies. This is the moment we have been waiting three seasons for! After countless good guys being murdered off, this was inevitable. I’m not ashamed to say that I will miss him. There are few characters on the show that we can hate so viscerally.

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Before you celebrate, keep in mind, he is barely a man. 

Joffrey is dead and Cersei believes Tyrion poisoned her son. She immediately orders him seized. Clearly Tyrion has been framed again. Remember the whole murder attempt on Bran’s life? This week’s episode was an A+! There was no frontal nudity and only one death, but it was the episode we were all hoping would happen!!!

Come back next week for our recap on “The Breaker of Chains.”

All media credited to HBO

Game of Thrones Review “Two Swords” S4E1

Game of Thrones for the casual Throny

Going through Walking Dead withdrawal? No need to go into a digital 12 step program because Game of Thrones is back! I’ve been a die hard fan for the first three seasons and, although I have only read the first book in the series, I fancy myself enough of a casual fan to walk you through the premier of Season 4, “Two Swords!” Caution: major spoilers for the first three seasons ahead.

Two things you need to know before we get started: the Lannisters are assholes and someone is either going to get fucked or killed in any given episode.

Seriously. What a douche.
Seriously. What a douche.

There isn’t a show on television that does sex and gratuitous violence better than GOT. Season three ended with the Lannisters’ (dicks of Westeros) total domination over nearly all of their enemies. Resident teenage sociopath, King Joffrey Bieber sits on the throne after surviving an uprising at King’s Landing (Capital of The Seven Kingdoms). He is preparing to wed Margaery Tyrell to add stability to the realms. The rebel army from the North has been defeated with Robb Stark betrayed and beheaded. His mother, Catelyn Stark also died in glorious fashion in last season’s Red Wedding by the orders of Tywin Lannister, (if you haven’t seen it, make it a HBOgo night). The Mother of Dragons, Daenerys Targaryen, leads an army more than 10,000 strong to avenge her family and over-throw the Lannisters. Jamie has returned to King’s Landing missing a right hand but gaining some much needed humility. Sansa Stark is in mourning over the news of the demise of her mother and her brother, but her short – in stature, but not in heart – husband Tyrion Lannister is by her side. Wildlings plan to attack The Wall and The White Walkers are still coming!

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Now that we’ve brought you up to speed, let’s pick up the pieces from The Red Wedding. “Two Swords” begins with patriarch Tywin Lannister melting down Ned Stark’s Valyrian steel sword and refashioning it into two blades, one for himself, and one for his now deformed son Jamie. Hence the title of the premier, Two Swords. Jamie is struggling to find a place for himself. He refuses to take rule over Lannister stronghold, Casterly Rock, and is rejected by his sister and former lover Cersei Lannister (Yes, that is totally normal in the Thrones world).

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We are not deprived of fan favorite Tyrion Lannister. The newlywed is tasked to greet a party of Dorne dignitaries arriving for Joffrey’s wedding. We are introduced to a new player in our game, Prince Oberyn Martell. We find him at Littlefinger’s brothel picking whores for his appetite. Oberyn also has a fierce hatred for all things Lannister and tells Tyrion that his sister, Elia was married to Rhaegar Targaryen, commonly referred to as the Mad King. She and her children were murdered by the Lannisters in their coup of King’s Landing. Oberyn is here to inform Tywin that, “Lannisters aren’t the only ones who pay their debts.”

Jon Snow has returned to the Knight’s Watch a different man. He has been through hell and he knows it. He has narrowly escaped death, his family has been slaughtered, and there are armies amassing on the other side of the wall. He faces trial for breaking his vows but is allowed to live because of his knowledge of what lies beyond. He is the most valuable asset to Castle Black, and perhaps the entire Kingdom. He is being followed by his former Wilding lover turned crazy ex-girlfriend, Ygritte. She is determined to have vengeance for Jon’s betrayal.

Daenerys is in dire need of the How to Train Your Dragon guidebook. They are growing out of control and may soon become more of a liability. She leads her freed slave-army Meereen, on yet another siege to free bonded souls. Note, the role of Daario, advisor and warrior to her army, was recast this season. His character is making brash attempts to win her heart – and so far, he is succeeding.

 My personal favorite badass, swords-woman, Brienne of Tarth, has followed Jamie to King’s Landing and reminds him that he made an oath to protect the remaining Starks. Brienne is noble and morally pure (as far as we’ve seen). She’s the one untainted spot in a world stained with traitors, thieves, murderers and rapists. The only other character with a sense of nobility like that was Ned Stark – and we know what that did for him. Could this be Jamie’s opportunity for redemption? He does bring up a good point about Sansa, though. Where in the world would she be safe? To a certain degree,  we at Hush thought that her misery was just really rough Karma, but how long before she plots her revenge?

Finally, we are reunited with Arya, my absolute favorite character, and boy is she pissed. She travels with The Hound. They are traveling to The Vale where he intends to sell her to her crazy Aunt Lysa, (remember the awkward breast-feeding one?) They stumble upon an inn where she recognizes Polliver, one of the king’s men and her former kidnapper. He is in possession of her sword, Needle and she wants it back.
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She also wants revenge for the death of her friend whom he killed in cold blood. She did not get this satisfaction for Mycah, the butcher’s boy who The Hound murdered. The Hound replies with one of Sherif’s favorite lines: “A man has to have a code,” a clear nod to Omar and Bunk’s conversation in The Wire. This was her opportunity to have revenge and forgive The Hound. The pair murder all in the inn and Arya stains her hands with the blood of her enemies. She has become a killer and is a serious threat to all who have wronged her. 
“Two Swords” was a much needed push back into our world of dragons and wolves. This season promises to have more death and sex and will keep us talking on Monday morning. Next week’s episode, “The Lion and the Rose” puts us North of the wall with Bran! All Men Must Die! The lion is Joffrey  and Margaery’s the rose (her mother is often referred to as The Mother of the Rose), so we’re looking forward to learning more reasons why we should hate Joffrey and more reasons we should love MargaeryTyrell (other than her GQ cover shoot)
All media credited to HBO
Written by John Soweto

Weekend Wrap-Up…April 6, 2014

You join us here on a Sunday afternoon, sans-Walking Dead. But rejoice! Season 4 of Game of Thrones is here to fill that gap in your life. Check out this titillating preview.

In other Game of Thrones news, Natalie Dormer (Joffrey’s wife, Margaery Tyrell) has posed for GQ in a very risqué way, luckily for us.

More Throny madness! Gwendoline Christie (Brienne of Tarth) will be playing Commander Lyme, commander of the rebellion and leader of District 13, in Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1.

The Heisenberg himself, Bryan Cranston, has signed on to write a memoir about his time filming Breaking Bad. If you’re like us, you will buy one hundred copies, build a fort out of them and scream at everybody who passes to “get out of your territory.” The book is due out next fall.

If you haven’t made time to go see Captain America: The Winter Soldier, it’s not too late. Wanna hear about how awesome it is? Check out our mostly spoiler-free review here.

Arrow just got a whole new level of crazy last week. Summer Glau’s character isn’t what she appears to be. That is, unless you’ve seen this Twitter picture of her in Ravager gear! Ravager is Slade Wilson’s daughter, and one bad B. Summer Glau is usually as deadly as she is beautiful, so I can’t wait to see her tear up Starling City.

Michael Bay’s TMNT (sigh…) has chosen to replace two of its voice actors. The new Leonardo and Splinter voices have been awarded to Johnny Knoxville – yep, the guy from Jackass – and Tony Shalhoub (WingsMonk). I swear, you can give yourself an aneurism worrying about this movie, but it’s best to just let it happen.

To celebrate Batman’s 75th anniversary, Cartoon Network will be airing an animated short, made by the master himself, Bruce Timm. If you don’t catch it tonight, I’m sure that it will be YouTube gold by this time tomorrow.

DC Animated’s next film, Son of Batman, is one of my most anticipated things of 2014. Check out this new clip that features Batman putting the hurt on Killer Croc. The movie comes out May 6th.

If you’re looking to blow some money, the Limited Edition Season 4 Blu-Ray set (wow, that’s a mouthful) for The Walking Dead has been announced and is now available for pre-order. Fans of the show will recognize the walker on the cover as “Tree Walker,” the walker Herschel convinced Carl not to put down.

Michonne and Rick are having a baby! Just kidding… Danai Gurira revealed the “news” to Jimmy Kimmel earlier this week.

Spiderman 2099 is back! The futuristic web-head made some guest appearance in Superior Spider-Man, but Miguel O’Hara will be getting his own series this July.

The Big Bang Theory is planning a Star Wars Day episode.  And Bob Newhart is going to be Sheldon’s Jedi Master.  Hmmmm….

Will Chiwetel Ejiofor be James Bond’s new nemesis?  We approve, but only if he dies a good death.

Ridley Scott + Halo + Digital Movie Short = Nerd Heaven?

There have been some new casting decisions made for Better Call Saul.  Several lawyers and a few criminals.  But really, we just care about Mike.

Kid President is getting his own show.  Unfortunately, its on a network no one has.  But good for that little fella!

The Volume 3 release of Batman: Death of the Family will come with Joker mask.  Yeah, that one.

Have you seen the new trailer for Lucy?  It has ScarJo and Morgan Freeman.  Sold.

Yeah, and there is that Gremlins remake.  Is nothing sacred?!

written by Sherif Elkhatib and Adrian Puryear

Shut Up and Take My Money: Game of Thrones Dragon Egg Canister

The money in our bank account is limited, so how unfair is it that there are endless gadgets, collectibles and toys out there that demand to be purchased? Let us help you sift through the crap, so you don’t can save that hard-earned cash for the things that deserve it. In other words, we give you the power to go to the counter and say, “Shut Up and Take My Money!”

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Item: Game of Thrones Dragon Egg Canister

What it is: Holy Mother of Dragons, Batman! HBO and Game of Thrones have released a cookie jar based of the design of one of Khaleesi’s dragon eggs. Rhaegal (the dragon that hatches from the green egg; there are also Viserion and Drogon who hatch from other-colored eggs) may be growing up and are causing a ruckus throughout the Seven Kingdoms, but Thronies like myself remember when they were precious cargo, thought to never hatch. The eggs themselves are beautifully painted and definitely looks like a dragon egg is supposed to. Plus, they hold cookies

How Much it Costs: This ceramic piece of destiny will run you $30. You can find it all over: from Amazon to ThinkGeek to the HBO Store. I’m not sure how long they’ll be available, as collectibles like this aren’t as hot of a commodity, but tend to disappear to the barren wastelands of eBay, where people love to upcharge collectibles like this for 200-300% of the original price.

Is It Worth It?: At $30, this dragon egg is considerably less than the cost of raising an army to challenge the Iron Throne, but more than the monthly cost of subscribing to HBO to watch GoT. When you look at buying an actual cookie jar, $30 sounds down-right expensive. I mean, it’s an item that is likely to sit around and collect crumbs for years. However, this is no ordinary cookie jar; this is Daenerys Targaryen’s dragon egg we’re talking about here. Friends will envy you and enemies will fear you with this cookie jar at your side!

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mmmm…. cookie….

Bottom Line: If eating cookies and watching Game of Thrones is your thing, this is for you. It might clutter up the kitchen, but it could add some flavor to your home, especially if you are a GoT enthusiast. This is the kind of things Birthday gifts were made of, easily justifiable for a friend, but hard to justify to spend on yourself. However you plan on eating your baked goods, join Game of Thrones for the Season 4 premiere, airing on April 6, 2014.

Photos credited to HBO Television

Written by Sherif Elkhatib

So Far this Week… March 12, 2014

With the expansion of Hush Comics, we have decided to give bi-weekly news updates.  Anything we find news-worthy will be posted here bi-weekly.  Have anything to add?  Post it in the comments!

A new volume of Kelly Sue DeConnick’s Captain Marvel drops today. If you’re wondering what you’re missing out on, check out our review of her first run in the series here.

The first part of Metal Gear Solid 5, MGS: Ground Zeroes, comes out next week. It’s the first big game for next gen consoles, and sure to impress at only $30

Friend of Hush Comics, Ken Arkind, had his first book, Coyotes, published and released yesterday.  Check it out here.

New Game of Thrones trailer arrived; the dragons are actually coming.

SLAM KICKS- Basketball Sneakers that Changed the Game came out yesterday, too.  Read about it here.

Arkham Knight is not the game that the PS3 deserves… and so it’s not getting it. It will be a next-gen exclusive.

Super-strength spider silk is coming to the market. For reals.

Extreme deviation in the new Ghost Rider series. Love or hate?

Denver Comic Con is celebrating 75 years of Batman with Kevin Conroy, Adam West, Burt Ward and Julie Newmar!

Also at Denver Comic Con, there will be a special Gargoyles 20th anniversary reunion.

Post-credit info for Captain America… but we’re not even spoiling it for ourselves, so here’s the link, if you’re into that sort of thing.

Terry Crews wants to play Luke Cage in a Netflix mini-series.  Here’s to hopin’.

999, an interactive novel coming to iOS next week.  Will you purchase it?

Avatar-like exo-skeletons are being prototyped in Japan.  Yeah, that’s a thing.

So Far this Week… March 5, 2014

With the expansion of Hush Comics, we have decided to give bi-weekly news updates.  Anything we find news-worthy will be posted here bi-weekly.  Have anything to add?  Post it in the comments!

Those sneaky bastards at Rocksteady took a year off (Arkham Origins was developed by WB Montreal) so they could work on Batman: Arkham Knight, the finale to the Arkham trilogy. Coming out this year for next-gen consoles, my mind is exploding with excitement. I mean, just look at the trailer:

Norman Reedus, Daryl Dixon himself, will be joining Jimmy Fallon on the Tonight Show in just a few hours. I can’t wait to see what kind of shenanigans they pull tonight. Just a couple days ago, Fallon, The Roots and Idina Menzel did a back-stage performance of “Let it Go” from Frozen.

People got legitimately upset when Tony Hawk and Funny or Die duped everybody into thinking hover boards had finally arrived.

The Iron Throne meets the wheelz of steel! HBO has gathered a bunch of rappers to create their very own Game of Thrones mixtape. It should give us enough material for our “Diggin’ Through the Crates” article for months. It’s expected to drop on Friday.

It’s about to go down in Arrow. Ollie may be fancied a hero in Starling City, but he’s made plenty of enemies – namely Suicide Squad and Deathstroke.

It’s been quite some time since Michael Bay has blown some shit up. A full-length trailer of Transformers 4 has been released, and, sad to say, I don’t really care what it’s about; I just wanna see Optimus Prime pimp-slap a Dinobot.

More casting for DC television shows Constantine and Gotham, among them being Harold Perrineau Jr. (one of my favorites on HBO’s Oz), who will play an angel who looks over Constantine.

To promote their upcoming Original Sin event, Marvel will be supplying the retailers willing to put up the big bucks with eyeballs. Awesome…Your move, DC.

As Deadpool has been fighting with and against everything in the Marvel universe, it was only time until he took on one of the symbiotes. Deadpool vs. Carnage comes out within the month.

He might be a nice guy in real life, but Joseph Gordon-Levitt is looking mean in the brand new teaser for Sin City 2.

LeBron James’ 61 point game inspired Marvel to post a drawing of him with a Captain America mask, probably to detract from the Batman comparisons made with the black one.

Lando was one smooth guy in Star Wars, but can Billie Dee Williams still pull off the moves when he joins the cast of Dancing With the Stars?

The Justice League is flying back onto the shelves of your local grocery stores. General Mills cereal boxes with contain comic books starring the DC team of all-stars throughout the month of March.

The conclusion of The Walking Dead: Governor novels is finally here. Released on Tuesday, Fall of the Governor: Part 2 completes a long-winded series of books. We loved the first book, but the rest of them have been so lackluster, we’re debating whether or not to finish it out.

So Far this Week… February 26, 2014

With the expansion of Hush Comics, we have decided to give bi-weekly news updates.  Anything we find news-worthy will be posted here bi-weekly.  Have anything to add?  Post it in the comments!

Arrow and Survivor come back tonight. About damn time! This week, we say hello to the Clock King.

Breaking Bad is finally completely available to stream on Netflix, in all it’s tragic glory. We laughed, we cried, we dressed up as meth cooks; it was the best. Open up our reviews or “Breaking Bad Week” articles while you enjoy the end of the decades’ best show.

Also in BrBa news, The Heisenberg himself, Bryan Cranston, is moving on to become a serial killer in the upcoming movie Holland, Michigan, acting along-side Naomi Watts. I’m instantly sold with anything this man does, so it will great seeing him back on the big screen.

The makers of Batman: Arkham Origins might not care about your glitchy game, but they do want you to enjoy the new “Cold, Cold Heart” DLC, released April 22nd and centered around a battle with Mr. Freeze.

Hideo Kojima has just collectively shoved everybody off the fence when it comes to buying Metal Gear SolidGround Zeroes. When the game is released on March 18th, next-gen gamers will be able to purchase Ground Zeroes for $10 less.

A gentleman and an entertainer, original Ghostbuster Harold Ramis has passed away, after complications from an auto-immune disease he had been with for years.

I’ve given it five episodes before I spread the good word, but FX’s Chozen is the real deal. Give it ten minutes, and I swear he will be your favorite white, gay rapper ever.

The upcoming Joseph Gordon-Levitt led Sandman movie has found a writer in Jack Thorne, who has written several British shows – including Skins and Shameless.

Adam Driver has been cast as a villain in Star Wars: Episode VII. Yup, the guy from HBO’s Girls. I hold judgment, though, and take it as a sign that we are one step closer to an Episode VII release.

Jason Momoa, who Thronies (men who love Game of Thrones) might know better as Khal Drogo, actually turned down the part given the role of Drax the Destroyer in Guardians of the Galaxy to avoid being type-casted as the big, brooding alien – similar to his role in Stargate: Atlantis. His loss.

The track listing for the soundtrack to the movie Divergent has been released. If you like Ellie Goulding, sprinkled in with some alternative and Hip-Hop, then you should love it. It’s still not on par with the Hunger Games movies’ soundtrack.

Written by Sherif Elkhatib and Adrian Puryear